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Inside the Integrus360: Connectedness
Nathan Derenski • August 6, 2026

Most leaders care about their people.
I believe that.
Most people do not step into leadership because they want to make life harder for the people around them.
They want to build something meaningful.
They want their teams to grow.
They want the organization to succeed.
But good intentions are not the same thing as healthy leadership behaviors.
That is one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn in my own leadership.
When I completed my first Integrus360 years ago, I was serving as an executive pastor. I had strong instincts around execution— I moved quickly, noticed what needed improvement, and pushed hard to keep things progressing.
My intentions were good.
- I wanted the church to grow.
- I wanted the ministry to be effective.
- I wanted our team to succeed.
But the feedback in my 360 showed me that some of the very behaviors I relied on most were creating constraints in other areas of my leadership. One of those areas was Connectedness, which came in with a low score.
It was not that I did not care about people; I simply had not developed the practical behaviors that allowed people to experience that care consistently.
Connectedness Is More Than Being Friendly
Connectedness is not about being the most outgoing person in the room, and it is not about becoming close friends with everyone on your team or filling the calendar with social events.
Connectedness is the visible expression of relational proximity.
It is the ongoing effort to know the people you work with, understand something about their lives, value them as people (not only for what they produce), and most importantly, communicate it effectively.
A leader may think, “My team knows I care.” But the team can only respond to the behaviors they actually experience.
Let me ask you something.
Do you make time to be with them when you don't need something?
Do you remember what they tell you in conversation and follow up later?
Can they come to you when they have a question, need clarity, or encounter an obstacle?
Those behaviors create connection. And when they are missing, the cost can quietly grow.
The Silent Cost of Disconnection
Low Connectedness rarely announces itself with a loud alarm.
Instead, people begin to fade.
They may stop offering ideas.
They may hesitate to raise a concern.
They may work around problems rather than bringing them to you.
They may continue completing their responsibilities while becoming less emotionally invested in the team.
Eventually, some of them leave.
When that happens, leaders often look first at compensation, benefits, workload, or advancement opportunities. While those factors do matter, sometimes the deeper issue is simpler: people did not feel connected to the leader.
When someone leaves, the organization loses more than the work they performed. It loses trust, relationships, context, and institutional knowledge. A replacement must be recruited, hired, trained, and integrated into the team.
Connectedness may not have its own line in the budget, but a lack of it eventually touches almost every line.
I Was Acting Like the Sheriff
Before receiving my Integrus360 feedback, I had a habit of walking around the office, I knew that successful leaders often did this to keep their finger on the pulse of their organization.
At the time, I probably would have described this as being present and aware of what was happening. I was checking in, staying involved, and making sure things were moving.
But after seeing my results, I began paying closer attention to how people responded when I entered their workspace.
They got nervous.
My arrival communicated that I was probably about to ask for a report, check on a deadline, identify a problem, or add something to their workload.
They were experiencing me like the sheriff.
I thought I was walking around like an engaged leader, but I was missing a crucial component that made those other leaders successful.
I wasn't actually connecting with my team.
That realization forced me to change the purpose of those interactions.
Instead of walking around to inspect, I began walking around to connect. I had to leave the work agenda behind and become more like the mayor—showing up, learning about people, and building relational familiarity.
I started asking simple questions.
“When was that picture taken?”
“How did your son’s baseball game go?”
“Tell me about that.”
Then I practiced something that was difficult for me at first: I did not bring the conversation back to work.
No report request. No reminder. No surprise assignment. No correction disguised as a casual visit.
I simply tried to know the person.
Connection Changed More Than the Conversation
The change did not happen overnight.
For a while, people were still waiting for the hidden work request. They had learned what my office visits usually meant, and it took consistency to build a different expectation.
But over time, they became more relaxed.
Then something else began to change.
People became more willing to come to me.
They would tell me when something was blocking their progress. They would ask for resources. They would request clarity before a misunderstanding became a larger problem.
The team did not become less productive because I was spending time connecting. We became more effective because people felt relationally safe enough to communicate honestly.
That is one of the most important things I have learned as a leader:
Connectedness does not compete with performance.
Healthy connection supports performance.
When people trust the leader, they are more likely to surface problems early, ask necessary questions, and accept greater responsibility. They do not have to spend as much energy protecting themselves or guessing how the leader will respond.
Connection makes transparency possible.
“I Don’t Have Time” Is the Wrong Conclusion
For many high-achieving leaders, the greatest obstacle to Connectedness is the calendar.
They look at the meetings, deadlines, decisions, and projects in front of them and think, “I do not have time for this.”
I understand that instinct, and I have felt it. But the fuller your calendar becomes, the less you can afford to disconnect from your team.
You need those people to carry the mission with you. You need them to tell you when something is not working. You need them to ask for clarity, identify risks, and bring forward ideas.
Connectedness does not always require a team dinner, an off-site, or a half day of activities. In demanding seasons, it may look much smaller.
- Send a personal voice message.
- Take 15 minutes to walk around the office.
- Ask someone how they are carrying the pressure.
- Acknowledge the work they are doing.
- Remove an obstacle from their path.
- Let them know you are still in the trenches with them.
Then, when the pressure eases, stop long enough to celebrate what the team accomplished and return to a healthier relational rhythm.
Connection Still Needs Boundaries
I wouldn't serve you well if I didn't take just a second to talk about the dangers of a Connectedness score that is too high. Because even something as important as Connectedness can become a constraint when it grows without balance.
A leader can become so relationally attached that accountability feels disloyal. Hard feedback gets delayed. Underperformance is tolerated. Necessary transitions become unnecessarily painful.
Healthy Connectedness does not require you to place one person above the mission. You can care deeply about someone and still tell the truth. You can value a relationship and still address a performance issue. You can honor a person and still recognize that their season on the team may be ending.
That is why the Integrus360 measures Connectedness as a dial rather than a pass-or-fail trait. The goal is not maximum connection. The goal is healthy, effective connection.
Nathan Derenski
Executive Coach
Integrus Leadership
Take the Walk
Meaningful connection is rarely built through one major conversation. It develops through small, consistent moments when people experience your interest without wondering what you need from them.
That is the purpose of a Connected Leader Walkaround.
It creates intentional space for you to step away from tasks, deadlines, and status updates long enough to engage the people behind the work. Over time, these agenda-free conversations can help your team feel more comfortable approaching you, sharing what they are experiencing, and raising concerns before they become larger problems.
The Connected Leader Walkaround is not about forcing small talk or pretending to be more relational than you are. It is a practical structure for making the care you already feel more visible through your behavior.
We created a simple tool to help you begin. It includes a framework for your walkaround, practical conversation prompts, and a Connection Log to help you remember what matters and follow up naturally.
Download the Connected Leader Walkaround and begin creating small, meaningful moments of connection with your team.
You may know that you value your people.
The more important question is: do they experience it?
You don't have to wonder. Download the tool today.
Ready to See the Full Picture?

How is your inner dialogue shaping the way that you lead?
Connectedness is one of 12 leadership behavior dials measured in the Integrus360. Each dial includes a score to indicate how you view your leadership, along with up to six anonymous describer scores, giving you unparalleled insight into how your leadership is experienced by others.
Complete your Integrus360 today, and then connect with a behavioral leadership expert to debrief your results and discover which behaviors strengthen your leadership, and more importantly, which behaviors are holding you back.
And if it's been more than 18 months since you last completed your 360, it's time to update your data. Because circumstances change and leaders grow, and your data evolves along with you.
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